31 December 2009

People and things I won't drag into the next decade

People I don’t hear from unless I call/email/text them –unless they’re dead, fingers or toes broken, or developed Alzheimers (the only logical excuses)
Fairweather friends
Self-destructive habits
Flaky people
Incomplete to-do lists
Negative people

30 December 2009



Another oldie but goodie

Click here

Shaking things up

2010 has got to be different than all previous years.
 Consider this my resolution:  I’m going to take seriously the fact that tomorrow isn’t promised to me and I’m going to act accordingly.  That means I’m going to take more chances. I’m going to get out of my comfort zone.
 I think too much and I end up talking myself out of things.
I don’t know how yet, but  I’m going to shake things up by not thinking about who’s looking at me, or how I look, or whether I’m going to fail.
Pray for me, and I’ll pray for you!

29 December 2009


A Black man elected President of the United States, in my lifetime!
My job (seriously- I love my job)
The coolest boss ever
The new Georgia Anne Muldrow Cd
The new Mary J Blige Cd
The portability of my laptop- I can write anywhere
My sister and I are now talking regularly
Back to back episodes of Martin on New Years Eve (though I’ll be at a party- I’m Tivo’ing it)

It snowed here today, in Beaverton Oregon. Snow was why I left Wisconsin
The death of Michael Jackson
My shyness
Mundane facebook messages
Kramer is a racist, but I can’t stop watching Seinfield

An oldie but goodie

 click on Wendy & Lisa

On December 29

1907, Robert Weaver, was born. He became the first Black man appointed to a presidential cabinet when President Lyndon B. Johnson named him to head the newly created Departmentof Housing and Urban Development.

A year in review: 2009; is it over yet?

This year has shaped up to be a very challenging year for me. Let me correct that. It has been the worst year for me. I’m glad to see the first Black President of the United States in my lifetime, and I’m glad that my nephew was as excited as I was, but as I look in the mirror, I have as many gray hairs on my head as President Obama now has, and he's been shouldering the burdens of the United States! 

It shouldn’t have been this way!

And I had started the year off on such a good footing and for every step foreward, I've been forced to take three steps backward. I had so many plans, so many things I thought I was going to have accomplished, but John Lennon said it best when he said life happens when you're busy making other plans.  Well, life REALLY happened for me. A friend told me to get out a sheet of paper and draw a line down the middle. On one side, write down all the good things that happened and write down the bad things on the other side. If the bad things outweigh the good things, then you should feel justified in your feelings. Well, I ran out of space on the bad list side, and I had to use the empty space on the good list side. Hopefully 2010 will be better.  It can’t be any worse. Let me take that back quickly. Wait--- let me change the subject altogether.

Soooooo, how’s the weather outside? Is it cold where you are?

28 December 2009


Short stories
The color Purple
A soak in a hot tub
Those who appreciate the small things
A smile
A father spending time with his kids
Getting a text message from my nephew
Communications I don’t have to initiate
Losing weight



what he said

(hypothetically spea-
) I

have a friend (I)
can’t swim.
He’s (I’m) a-
of drowning.
He will not stand in a swimming pool
even if
the height is a foot shorter
than his (my)
and because he’s afraid of heights,
he (I) don’t go mountain-climbing.
he hates frigid,
snowy weater,
so he (I) moved away from Wisconsin.
but he said that he would rather
stand in a ten foot deep swimming pool
or climb the highest mountain in the middle of a blizzard,


hypothetically speaking,
of course.

that's what he said.

23 December 2009


And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling: "How could it be so?

"It came without ribbons! It came without tags!

"It came without packages, boxes or bags!"

And he puzzled three hours, till his puzzler was sore.

Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before.

"Maybe Christmas," he thought, "doesn't come from a store.

"Maybe Christmas... perhaps... means a little bit more!"

-- Dr. Seuss from "How The Grinch Stole Christmas"

"Man is most nearly himself when he achieves the seriousness of a child at play."


On December 23,

in 1867, Madame C.J. Walker, born Sarah Breedlove on this day. She started a Black hair-care business in Denver, CO; she altered  curling irons that were popularized by the French to suit the texture of Black women's hair. She is arguably ther first woman millionaire in the U.S.

--courtesy blackfacts.com

22 December 2009


"Great ambition is the passion of a great character. Those endowed with it may perform very good or very bad acts. All depends on the principles which direct them."
                        --Napoleon Bonaparte

On December 22

in 1883, Arthur Wergs Mitchell, 1st African American to be elected to Congress (in 1935), is born in Lafayette, Ala.

Morning Quote

"The only thing more expensive than education is ignorance."

--Benjamin Franklin

The Origin of Santa Claus

The first rendering of Santa Claus, published in 1863 in Harper’s Weekly  of New York, showed a hefty little gnome entering a chimney. He issued from the hand of the artist Thomas Nast, vaguely inspired by the legend of Saint Nicholas.
Christmas of 1930 saw Santa Claus working for Coca-Cola. Before then he did wear a suit and generally preferred to wear blue or green. The artist Haddon Sundbloom dressed him in the company colors, bright red with white piping, and gave him the features familiar to us all. Every child’s friend has a white beard, laughs all the time, travels by sleigh, and is so plump that no one can figure out how he gets down the world’s chimneys loaded with presents and carrying a Coke in each hand.
Neither can anyone figure out what he has to do with the birth of Christ.

21 December 2009

I loved this article about believing in God, regardless


A poem after seeing 'precious'

It was for us
And by us.
Sold by us.
Promoted by us
financed by us by the richest of the richest of us

& pushed to us:
with visions of gold,
dvd royalties,
netflix & blockbuster dvd rentals dancing in their heads:
for our entertainment.

We shake our heads
Stepping away from our dinner table
to drive to the theater mall
to see the horror story of people some of us know:
we stand in line to see one of our black girls pregnant for the 2nd time resulting from the rape of her black father
we watch her run down the street with a stolen bucket of fried chicken with her lips and the surrounding areas glistening with chicken grease
before and after getting beaten
by her mother;
we see the mother practically force-feeding
her soul food, telling her
“don’t let it get cold, ‘cause cold-ass pigs feet is nasty”,
Further weighing her down
and we laugh when she laughs or says something funny
and we cry when she cries
watching what was made for us to see.

Once the movie has successfully pressed it’s racial stereotypes further down than any blaxploitation movie has ever done-
The movie is over.
then we shake our heads at this-
yet another negative performance considered Oscar-worthy-
we dry our eyes
and we go home
in anticipation of the next rape of our black women/
                         the next black corrupt cop
                         or the next black  heroine addict
                         on the big screen

 where are the oscar-worthy movies featuring positive black role models?

A good man is hard to find?

I heard that this past friday when I met a woman at the mall while I was shopping for a specific mp3 player that my nephew wanted. When this woman and I talked for a while, and she made the statement, I let her know that I was one of the good ones. She responded with, "you're a bit shorter and thicker than what I usually go for," before asking what I did for a living.

A good man is hard to find?

I hear that statement a lot, and I know it’s lie. A good man is not hard to find. I’m one of them, and I have a few single friends in the same predicament. Most women I know, are in relationships that they don’t want to be in. Either because they’ve been convinced that they can’t do better, or because they feel stuck with kids and huge bills that are both their names. It’s a matter of choice. I happen to know three women that have been made to feel they would be lost without the men in their lives, while the men were offering nothing worthwhile to the relationship. Some of us are not Shemar Moores, some are not six feet five and a hundred eighty-five pounds, some of us don’t have six pack abs, some are not high-powered attorneys. Some are mechanics, barbers, tow truck drivers or even maintenance workers. Some of us are good, single, hard-working men, looking for someone that makes makes our lives better just for being in it.

It’s better to be alone, than to wish you were.

A coworker coined that term based on her experiences, when I confided in her that I was tired of being alone. The first man she was ever in a relationship was about 2 inches shorter her. He was slightly overweight, and he came from a poor family. He was a chemistry major, and though he treated her like a princess, and she was happy, her college friends and siblings convinced her that they were no match; that she could do much better. She took their advice and sought someone better. She didn’t have to try hard because a quarterback on her college football team had his eye on her. He was tall, blonde, and very good-looking. He had just transferred from a rival college, and his parents owned most of the buildings in her local town. Because all her friends were jealous of the attention he was giving her, she felt honored that he would even look in her direction. They sarcastically called him Mr Wonderful.

A year after graduation, they got married. Almost immediately after they gave their I-dos, he turned out to be not so wonderful after all. She didn’t know how to drive and she lost her job as a bank teller when he was too lazy to drive her to work and the bus got her to work fifteen minutes late. When their first boy died within minutes following his birth, Mr Wonderful was at home with his dad and brothers, watching the Kansas City Chiefs beat the Minnesota Vikings, 23-7 in the Superbowl (in 1970). When their second son was born premature, she had to call her brother to take her to the hospital because the 1972 World Series was half way over and Mr Wonderful wanted the Cincinnati Reds to win (they lost). When their daughter, born in 1975 had to be rushed to the hospital because she went into Anaphylactic shock when Mr Wonderful, forgetting she was allergic to peanuts, gave her some. She ended up dying due to heart failure and circulatory collapse. Because they were both dealing their daughter’s death, the relationship was further strained. Then his parents’ real estate empire had collapsed when they were prosecuted by the U.S. Attorney’s office for being part of a mortgage fraud conspiracy group, and the house they lived in was seized and they had to live in a motel for a few months. Then in 1977 he went to the 7-eleven for cigarettes and didn’t come back until New Years Eve, 1981, acting as if he had only been gone for a few minutes, when he retrieved from his pocket, a packet of cigarettes. When she tried to divorce him he refused to sign the papers.

Anyway, she went back to her hometown to see her family over the Christmas holidays, and she saw her first college sweetheart at the mall. He was still slightly overweight, and he was happy. He was holding his daughter’s hand and she was holding her mother’s hand as they walked past stores, peering inside. Their son was on his other side, holding his hand. When she saw them and spoke, and was introduced to his family. He was a chemical engineer in Princeton New Jersey, and she was stay-at home mom and she sold Avon on the side, and they were happy and the kids were happy, and she felt a piercing in her heart, she told me. Saying that she wanted to kick her own self in her behind for letting her friends and siblings put the thought in her head that she didn’t want what she really did want- a man that treated her like a princess, instead of, like gum on the bottom of his football cleats.

When I hear that a good man is hard to find, I cringe inside. Not counting my mother and sister (who both say I'm the nicest guy to walk the earth besides my grandfather), every female who has taken the time to get to know me always has a rebuttal, "except you, Alieux. You're a good man." They happen to be friends of mine, who don't want to cross that line. They, of course, have no friends that they feel are worthy of me; 'that I can do better than them.'  Even my exes try to return to me, having regreted their decision to leave me for someone they deemed to be hotter and finer, and not necessarily nicer. My friends used to call my apartment in Milwaukee, the home for battered women, because they would show up on my doorstep with black eyes and busted lips, needing a temporary place to stay because their new man beat them up. I would cut off my wrist before even thinking of hitting a woman. I believe my grandfather would crawl out of his casket tobeat my a** if I did that!

Some of us are not Shemar Moores, some are not six feet five and a hundred eighty-five pounds, some of us don’t have six pack abs, some are not high-powered attorneys. Some are mechanics, barbers, tow truck drivers or even maintenance workers. Some of us are black, white, asian, latino, indian, arab, persian. Some of us are good, single, hard-working men, looking for someone that makes our lives better just for being in it.

20 December 2009

"For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace, as in all churches of the saints."

-1 Corinthians 14:33 KJV

"We don't have to engage in grand,

heroic actions to participate
in the process of change.
Small acts,
when multiplied by millions of people,
can transform the world. "

— Howard Zinn
My best friend is Steve Demuth. My other best friend is intuition.
-- Alexgeorge
"Stop fighting the battles that aren't yours. Let the right one fight them."

-- Alexgeorge

I was watching a movie this morning about a Christian man who neglected his wife but spent every spare second of this free time as a Deacon, tending to the needs of  the church. His wife was fighting the temptation to sleep with her male boss(and lost), a very successful man who was trying to convince her to leave her husband. She was upset that her husband was too engrossed in the lives of the people in the church and forgetting her birthday, her anniversaries, and other important events in her life.  I was talking to the Deacon on the dvd screen (talking to my self) and I said: "Stop fighting the battles that aren't yours. Let the right one fight them."

And when I wrote that on this blog, and I saw the words, I smiled, and I said to myself;  "I'm gonna stop fighting the battles that aren't mine. I'm gonna let God fight them."

   Life is what happens to you
while you're busy making other plans.

--John Lennon

18 December 2009

Tracy1186, pt 1

(The names have been changed to protect the innocent. And the guilty)

A former co-worker of mine, named Tracy, found out that one of her friends from high school is not really her friend, but someone much closer, and she was more angry than I had ever seen her. This ‘person who was much closer’ was smart, and for that she was embarrassed and hurt as well.

It was Thanksgiving, and she had gone home to see her family and friends. It had been a long time since she had seen her parents because her job as an attorney required a great deal of travel to and from Asia, a bit more than when she was promised when she was hired at the firm. Since she was in Singapore more than she was in her home in Baltimore Maryland, she bought an apartment there.

This trip was going to be a total surprise to her family. She told her friends, flesh and blood and even Facebook- that she was coming to Knoxville Tennessee to see her parents. One Facebook friend in particular, Dana Turner, from her class of ’86, was excited to see her when she came to town. They weren’t friends while in high school because she was very shy at the time and had no friends. They had planned on doing some partying and drinking and smoking some weed etc., but the evening before Tracy’s flight, Dana called to say she had to go to Memphis to see her father who was in the hospital. Tracy understood why Dana had to see her father but she was disappointed.

So, when Tracy showed up at her parent’s doorstep that Thanksgiving morning, her parents were pleasantly surprised to see her. Her father greeted her at the door, and she removed her coat and left her luggage in the living room, and they went in the kitchen to see her mother, who was mashing sweet potatoes in a bowl.

“Tracy!” her mother shouted. “What a surprise! I’m so glad to see you!”

And after they hugged, Tracy washed her hands and took over the making of the sweet potato pie while her mother went to preparing a pot roast. Tracy went back in her ‘guarded mode,’ where she only told her mother what she wanted her to know, and kept up the façade of her being a good Christian girl that never smoked or drank and attended church every weekend, whether she was in Silver Spring or Singapore.

Dinner, and conversation with her brothers, their wives and children were good. While waiting for the meal to digest before for cutting into the cakes and pies, Tracy asked if she could use her mother’s computer.

When she typed ‘www., and then the letter f on the browser, it began to prefill with ‘www.facebook’ all by itself; it occurred to Tracy that someone in the house, perhaps her mother or father, had a facebook account. No one else lived there, and her brothers all lived out of state as well. It’s not like they were coming to Knoxville to use her parents’ internet.

On the facebook site, below the box checked ‘keep me logged in,’ was Dana’s email address, prefilled. The password was blank. Then Tracy clicked the “forget your password” link. Then she opened another to get to the yahoo site that prefilled with Dana’s email address and password. Once she accessed the yahoo site she received the password for facebook. The password was Tracy1186. Tracy’s name, and November ’86, the month and year she was born.

Tracy was getting heated. She felt violated. She couldn’t believe that someone in the house was sneaky and conniving enough to pretend to be a high school classmate to get information about her, information she would more readily confide to a friend than a parent. It was her mother that she suspected was the guilty party. She was a housewife , the type that always wanted to know what other people were doing, who would get upset when no one would confide in her. Her father was a corporate attorney, who, Richard, her oldest brother suspected cheating on their mother; neither did he have the time to pose as someone else, nor the brain power to even think the idea up.

Tracy thought about all the secrets she had told ‘Dana’. She felt naked, and she was ashamed. She was wondering how she was going to show her face when she returned to the dining room table. She suddenly began to worry about her mother’s opinion of her. She considered confronting her mother, but she decided to seek revenge.

She wanted to be creative with her revenge, so she called the most creative, the most dramatic person she knew---

She called me.

To be continued….

Happy Birthday, Ossie Davis

Ossie Davis was born on this date in 1917. He was an African American actor, writer, producer, director, and a "giant of civil rights." It is hard to think of Ossie Davis without thinking of his wife, Ruby Dee. The two of them demonstrated the power of a committed love between a married couple.

Raiford Chatman Davis (his birth name) was the oldest of five children born to Laura Cooper and Kince Davis in Cogden, GA. He picked up his nickname others mistook his mother's articulation of his initials, "R.C” as "Ossie." He headed for Howard University, where he studied under drama critic Alain LeRoy Locke, the first Black Rhodes Scholar. Davis began his career as a writer and an actor with the Rose McClendon Players in Harlem in 1939.
Davis and Ruby Dee were married in 1948, and are the parents of three children. In 1961, Davis wrote and starred in the critically acclaimed “Purlie Victorious.”

He wrote and directed many films, including “Cotton Comes to Harlem” (1970) and “Countdown at Kusini” (co-produced with his wife, Ruby Dee, 1976), the first American feature film to be shot entirely in Africa by Black professionals.
Davis wrote a number of books and received many honors and citations, including the Hall of Fame Award for Outstanding Artistic Achievement in 1989; the Theater Hall of Fame in 1994; the U.S. National Medal for the Arts in 1995; the New York Urban League Frederick Douglass Award; the NAACP Image Award and more. Dee and Davis were joint Kennedy Center honorees in December. They were cited not only for their "theatrical and film achievement," but because they opened "many a door previously shut tight to African American artists and planted the seed for the flowering of America's multicultural humanity."
Davis and Dee were eloquent voices and fundraisers for civil rights issues from the McCarthy era in the 1950s. They were blacklisted because of their activities, and well into the 1980s and '90s, Davis continued as a spokesman for numerous causes of equality.
Ossie Davis was found dead on February 4, 2005, in his hotel room in Miami Beach, FL, at the age of 87.

--courtesy  electronicvillage.blogspot.com

17 December 2009

an education

At my age, I’m still learning about myself and my relationship to other people. I’m glad to know that I still have something to learn, though I wish I had learned it twenty or thirty years ago. I know, some people learn this early in their lives. I’m a bit of a late-bloomer in this regard. My sister learned it, and she’s younger than me. Since I was a child, it’s always been important to me that I’m loved and appreciated by everyone I meet. I was the good kid. I was the one child that never caused my mother a single minute of heartbreak, and I’m proud of it. My mother still brags and testifies that fact in church, and to friends, new and old. It’s in my Dna; it’s affected my behavior, and up until recently I’m discovering that it also affects the way I’m treated in return, with some negative results.

Because my mother drilled in my head, Bible verses about ‘honoring thy mother and thy father’, and ‘you reap what you sow’, etc., as a child, I was actually afraid of two things. Disrespecting people, and being accused of disrespecting people. I went out of my way to be good. I have cousins that have been murdered or have served jail sentences, and they have caused their mother nothing but heartache. My mother always told us that her cousin (their mother) caused her mother heartache as well, ‘and she’s reaping what she had sown.’ I have always tried to be the best son, the best grandson, the best brother, the best uncle, the best human being that I can be. While being the best has the advantage of being appreciated by some, it causes resentment by others. Being ‘the good one’ causes resentment because it forces parents to verbally compare children. I used to cringe at the question asked to my sister; “Why can’t you be like Alieux?” This did nothing to better my relationship with her.
In some cases my being the best, the nicest, or the coolest, is completely disregarded or overlooked altogether or has been used to the advantage by some. My sister has always spoken her mind, whether it was hurtful or not. If it was in her heart, she would say it. She also has no problem saying no. I envied her, sometimes.  I often hear the phrase “ (insert name here) is so cheap and selfish, but Alieux, I know you’re going to help me. You’ve never let me down.” Even if I wanted to say no at that point, I was set up to say yes.
What I’m learning is that just because you’re the best, or the coolest person, that doesn’t entitle people to react accordingly. People will treat you the way they want to treat you. This used to upset me. I guess I was naïve.
I have discovered recently that I have been focusing too much on other’s opinions of me and none of myself. But that’s over. With age comes wisdom. I’m still going to treat people the way I would want them to treat me. I’m not going to bend over backwards anymore, and I’m not going to concern myself with why someone doesn’t like me though I’ve been good to them. I’m going to be good to myself. And I'm going to say no, if that's what's in my heart.

But I'll wait until after Christmas!

u caught me

Despite the

caught me
doing something
didn’t think was possible:
somehow along the way
either the picture of despair became blurry
or in your way,
U somehow knew words
that were most appropriate for forgetting
for soothing
for inspiration
for laughter strong enough to make me forget why I wanted to cry.
I wonder if God sent you to me
for only He knew knows the issue.
caught me
doing something
didn’t think was possible:


for that,
I thank you.


11 December 2009

Funny quote

"One of the great things about books is sometimes there are some fantastic pictures."

-George W. Bush

On December 11

in 1928, Louis Latimer died. He began his career as one of Alexander Graham Bell's draftsmen ... but he quickly developed into a widely respected scientist and inventor. After leaving Bell's company, Latimer joined a little business called General Electric which was begun by some guy named Thomas Edison. Latimer was the only African American engineer/scientist member of the elite Edison Pioneers research and development organization. One of Latimer's inventions was the filament for Edison's light bulb. Until Latimer's filament, Edison's light bulbs would burn only for a few minutes. Latimer's filament burned for hours.

courtesy   blackfacts.com

10 December 2009

Quote of the day

"I am not afraid of an army of lions led by a sheep; I am afraid of an army of sheep led by a lion." -- Alexander The Great

An old proverb has it that teaching fishing is better than handing out fish.

Bishop Pedro Casaldaliga, from the diocese of Sao Felix do Araguaia, Mato Grosso state, Brazil, says “yes, that is correct, a very good thought. But suppose someone buys the river that had belonged to all and outlaws fishing? Or suppose toxic waste pollutes the river and poisons the fish? In other words, suppose what happens is what is happening now?”

let me tell u what i heard...


                About 15 years ago I worked at this company that, in trying to stay one step ahead of the curve, was taking ten steps backwards, every few months .They had consultants both  moving us from department to  department, based on our strengths or weaknesses like chess pieces, or changing the divisions of the company to which our departments reported for about a year until they got it right. From month to month, I had no loyalty to my supervisor because I had a different one every few months.  Then my department, Underwriting, went from reporting to Actuarial to reporting  to Finance (with Actuarial eventually reporting to Finance as well) over the weekend, I began to worry. On that following  Monday morning I would be reporting to Angela Moffet (not her real name). That previous Friday, I was warned by at least 5 different people in the company who didn’t even know each other,  that, “you are not going to like her. She’s a total b#@*h. Be careful. No one gets along with her. She’s a troublemaker. She's evil. I wouldn't wish her on my worst enemy.”

                My weekend was wrecked. I was almost paralyzed by fear. I had nightmares of this woman , my new boss, instantly hating me and firing me on the spot. I would be crying while running through the Sales office and hiding underneath a desk!  I prayed and prayed, and when Monday morning came, I reluctantly went to work. I reported to her, mentally preparing myself for the onslaught.  I had decided I was going to be as friendly, as sociable and as much a team player as I could possibly be within reason.

But guess what?

I don’t know if it’s because their opinions  of Angela were based on a personality clash she may have had with one person and it had spread throughout the company or if she really was that type of person to other people. All I know is that, just by being myself, and not bending over backwards or jumping through any hoops to please her, not only did we not clash, not even once, but she became one of the best supervisors I have ever had.

Even when I started job-hunting outside the company and I asked her for a reference, she asked me to write it and she’d sign it. We even shared jokes. Whenever we had to go to Green Bay for meetings we even shared the same car. Most of my coworkers disliked her, but we got along pretty well. A few of my coworkers resented our business relationship, but to reiterate, I did nothing to make her be nice to me.

I say all this to say that, I do listen to what people say, but I take it with a grain of salt. I appreciate being warned of danger ahead because it helps me to proceed with caution, and it allows me to pray for direction (s) before entering the danger zone.
I also know that just because someone  thinks someone is evil doesn’t mean  I will experience that evilness. It doesn’t mean we will have shared experiences. It also doesn’t mean the person rumored to be evil  is indeed, evil.

My mother used to say that when you point a finger at someone, you have 3 fingers pointing back at you.


08 December 2009

Like a Star

This song was on my mind the past hour. I had to find it and post it.

07 December 2009

Are you authentic?

or are you under the radar, silent,  concerned about trying to please everyone all the time, and trying to fit in?

"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken." — Oscar Wilde

Being yourself is celebrating you, as an individual - learning to express yourself and be happy with who you are. For some people, it's learning to love yourself, for others, it's not hiding who you are or changing things about you to fit in. So read on to know how to express the inner you.

 Define yourself. You can't be yourself if you don't know, understand, and accept yourself first. It should be your primary goal to find this out. Try to take time to yourself and contemplate your life and choices. Try to think about what kind of things you would or wouldn't like to do, and act accordingly; finding out through trial and error helps more than you might think it does. You can even take personality tests, but be careful to only take what you want from them and not let them define you. Work on accepting mistakes and choices you've made; they're done and in the past, so there is no use crying over spilled milk.

Stop caring about how people perceive you. The fact is, it really doesn't matter. It's impossible to be yourself when you're caught up in wondering "Do they think I'm funny? Does she think I'm fat? Do they think I'm stupid?" To be yourself, you've got to let go of these concerns and just let your behavior flow, with only your consideration of others as a filter — not their consideration of you. Besides, if you change yourself for one person or group, another person or group may not like you, and you could go around in a vicious cycle trying to please people; it's totally pointless in the end, and it leaves you exhausted. However, if someone you trust and respect critiques aspects of who you are, feel free to judge (honestly) whether or not it is accurate instead of accepting or dismissing the critique unconditionally.

Be honest and open. What have you got to hide? We're all imperfect, growing, learning human beings. If you feel ashamed or insecure about any aspect of yourself — and you feel that you have to hide those parts of you, whether physically or emotionally — then you have to come to terms with that and learn to convert your so-called flaws into individualistic quirks. Be honest with yourself, but don't beat yourself up; apply this philosophy to others, as well. There is a difference between being critical and being honest; learn to watch the way you say things to yourself and others when being honest.

Relax. Stop worrying about the worst that could happen, especially in social situations. So what if you fall flat on your face? Or get spinach stuck in your teeth? Learn to laugh at yourself both when it happens and afterwards. Turn it into a funny story that you can share with others. It lets them know that you're not perfect and makes you feel more at ease, too. It's also an attractive quality for someone to be able to laugh at themselves and not take themselves too seriously!

Develop and express your individuality. Whether it's your sense of style, or even your manner of speaking, if your preferred way of doing something strays from the mainstream, then be proud of it... unless it's destructive to yourself or others. Be a character, not a type.

Have a productive day. Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and that some days, you're the statue. People might raise eyebrows and even make fun, but as long as you can shrug and say "Hey, that's just me" and leave it at that, people will ultimately respect you for it, and you'll respect yourself.

Believe in who you are. If you're always working to be someone you're not, you'll never be a happy person. Be yourself and show the world you're proud of the way you are! Nobody knows you better than you and that's how it should be. You deserve to be your own best friend, so start trying to figure out how you can do that. If you had to hang out with yourself for a day, what is the most fun type of person you could be, while still being yourself? What is the best version of you? Believe in this idea and use that as your starting point. Love and accept yourself as you are now.

Follow your own style. The common thing a lot of people do is copy other's actions because it seems like the better route to fit in, but really, shouldn't you stand out? Standing out is very hard, yes, but you need to try avoid assuming other people's perspectives of you. Maybe you like to sit outside on the deck under a umbrella in the middle of the rain, maybe you have different ideas of things, rather than other people, maybe you like strawberry cake instead of the common chocolate cake, whatever you are, accept it. Being different is absolutely beautiful and it attracts people to you.

--courtesy  WikiHow

I don't know all the answers. As a matter of fact, I'm reading this, as sometimes I feel the need to please everyone all the time

On December 7,

Reginald F. Lewis was born in Baltimore, Maryland, 1942. He was the richest African American man in the 1980's. He grew up in a middle class neighborhood. He won a football scholarship to Virginia State College (now Virginia State University), graduating with a degree in economics in 1965. He received his law degree from Harvard Law School in 1968. He was a partner in Murphy, Thorpe & Lewis, the first Black law firm on Wall Street. In 1989 he became president and CEO of TLC Beatrice International Holding Inc. He also was the first African American to build a billion dollar company.With TLC's leverage acquisition of Beatrice International Food Company, Lewis became the head of the largest Black-owned business in the United States. TLC Beatrice had revenues of $1.54 billion in 1992.

 He was also a member of Kappa Alpha Psi.

In 1992, Forbes magazine listed Lewis among the 400 richest Americans with a net worth estimated at $400 million. He died at age 50, from brain cancer.

In his spare time, he mentored African-American students and entrepreneurs. Lewis donated $1 million dollars to Howard University and $3 million to Harvard Law School where a building is named in his honor. He holds the distinction of the being the only African-American with a building named in his honor on a Ivy League campus.

In the early 90's, Lewis tried unsuccessfully to buy the Baltimore Orioles. After his death, his brother and his widow Loida ran TLC Beatrice, they would eventually sale the company for billions. At the time of his death, Reginald Lewis was worth $500 million dollars.

courtesy, blackfacts.com, wikipedia and panachereport.com

06 December 2009

" In the modern era of civilization, we are subject to laughing lies that mock the struggle to stand for Life. After the slaughter of thousands of Iraqis, mostly women and children, after activists for Life stood up and said no to war - Bush confessed that “the weapons of mass destruction never existed.” But says Galeano, “‘the most lethal weapons ever devised’ were his own speeches.”

Stronger, faster, smarter, wiser, tougher, taller, brighter, better

I see myself in this picture.
and I'm smiling.

One day I hope to will see my nephew, God-daughter, sons, daughters, etc
overcoming challenges
and smiling
as well


We are puny humans:

exterminators of everything,
hunters of our own,
creators of the atom bomb, the hydrogen bomb, and the neutron bomb, which is the healthiest of all bombs since it vaporizes people and leaves objects intact,
we, the only animals who invent machines,
the only ones who live at the service of the machines they invent,
the only ones who devour their own home,
the only ones who poison the water they drink and the earth that feeds them,
the only ones capable of renting or selling themselves, or renting or selling their fellow humans,
the only ones who kill for fun,
the only ones who torture,
the only runs who rape,
And also
the only ones who laugh,
the only ones who daydream,
the ones who make silk from the spit of a worm,
the ones who find beauty in rubbish,
the ones who discover colors beyond the rainbow,
the ones who furnish the voices of the world with new music,
and who create words so that
neither reality nor memory will be mute.

--Lenore Jean Daniels, PhD

Florida v Alabama

Yesterday I was watching Florida vs Alabama and I noticed that Todd Tebow had "John 16:33" written in the black stripes under his eyes.  The verse is

"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."

His team lost to Alabama in the SEC Championship game, though.

04 December 2009

Learning from the Dead

His arms were
where he left them.
Not in defense of self,
Doing what he loved,

The right hand gripping a big stainless steel spoon
Stirring a pot of collard greens
The air filled with the aroma of smoked ham hocks spaghetti sauce turkey and dressing sweet potato pies hot and fresh out the oven
His daughter, granddaughter, and me, his grandson,
Our mouths having been watered
Since before we even made the 65 mile trek to his Chicago home .
I’ve learned from the dead.
From him now.
In the presence of suits form-fitting black dresses matching wide-brimmed black hats white handkerchiefs and tears
I remember a homeless woman with two little children in tow
Making herself known
Speaking kindly of him
In his coffin
She (and her kids)
having been fed
anytime they were hungry.
By him;
I learned more about him dead

Wanting to be like him-


-- by alexgeorge

03 December 2009


Thanks for the punishment.

The tower that symbolized the sin of human arrogance rose in Babylon, the cursed city known in the Bible as “harlot and mother of all harlots.”

Heavens wrath did not delay: God condemned Babylonians to speak in many tongues so no one would ever understand them, and the tower was left half-finished for all time.

According to the ancient Hebrews, the flowering of human languages was divine punishment.

Perhaps, but in His desire to rebuke, God saved us from the boredom of a single tongue.

So, the Wednesday before Thanksgiving, I was up late. I tend to procrastinate, and then I rush to get things done quickly. I had already been to the grocery store after work, having come home with the ingredients needed to make the baked macaroni & cheese , pumpkin pie and hazelnut cake that I was bringing to a friend’s house the next afternoon , but I was worried that I might not have gotten everything I needed, and the stores would be closed Thanksgiving morning. So, I went to the kitchen to prepare the baked macaroni & cheese, and I realized I had forgotten one of the two most important ingredients- the elbow macaroni. So I put on a pair of gym shorts, t shirt and flip flops and headed to the store. This was about 2 in the morning.

So, I get to the store, and I get my macaroni, and kind of regret making sure that I hadn’t forgot anything else, and I walk by the produce section, and I see this beautiful black woman. I’m staring at her, and insisting that I must say something. I decided that I was not going to talk myself out of it, but as I took a step towards her, I bump into a stack of avocados, set up in a pyramid formation about 4 feet high. Within seconds the aisle was sea of avocados, rolling in every direction, as I reach down the pick them up. I hear a woman’s voice behind me.

“I’ve knocked down a stack of oranges before, staring at someone,”

I look to my left to see an even more attractive black woman. I’m speechless. The type of women I’m attracted to mostly are as rare in Beaverton Oregon as a Jewish person in a Mosque, and I’m thanking God in my silence. So, I smile because she’s trying to make me feel better. And as I open my mouth to say whatever comes out of it, she says;

“She’s gorgeous.”

I respond by saying, “so are you.”

She smiles at me.

Her response?

“Thanks, that’s my girlfriend.”

Then she scurried off, walking around the avocados, towards her.

I was so jealous. Two black women perhaps in their 30s. Two beautiful black women. In Beaverton. Together.

And me, and this box of elbow macaroni.

02 December 2009

Funny sign


"If you don't make a decision, then someone will decide for you."

I don't know the original author of the above quote, but it came to me earlier in the day. I 'googled' and 'bing'd' it, and I couldn't find it or a variation of it anywhere, but I know I didn't make it up. I like it, though.

funny quote

Scientists say because of global warming they expect the world's oceans to rise four and a half feet. The scientists say this can mean only one thing - Gary Coleman is going to drown.

-- Conan OBrien

01 December 2009

(starts with F)


Big vs Little

 "Stop telling GOD how big your storm is. Start telling the storm how BIG your GOD is."

A coworker has this in her email signature. Reading that gives me peace of mind. I don't know about everyone else, but I worry alot, mostly over small stuff, and when she and I correspond throughout the day, and I see the above quote at the bottom of her email, I have to stop in my tracks, and thank God for being bigger than whatever the current challenge is.

I like the picture of David & Goliath above.  Goliath just knew that David was going to be easy, but David reminded him in his way, how big God is.


the most beautiful things

On December 1,

Rosa Parks refused to change seats on a Montgomery, Alabama, bus. On December 5, blacks began a boycott of the bus system, which continued until shortly after December 13, 1956, when the U.S. Supreme Court outlawed bus segregation in the city. 
If I"m ever blessed with a wife and children, I would love to name my daughter Rosa. I'd want her to be like Ms Rosa Parks;  an ordinary woman who did something while simple, was extraordinarily brave during her time.